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January 18, 2013

Adam's Friday Mailbag: Fake Girlffriend Edition

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Adam's Friday Mailbag: Fake GF Edition

Manti Te'o has opened up a whole new world for me. I never thought about it but I could have had so many hot girlfriends back in the day. All I had to do was make up their whereabouts, identity, and health conditions and I'd be good to go!

The number of imaginary make out sessions I could've had with my imaginary girlfriend would've been endless. I would've been giving all my friends girl advice and I would've been the coolest kid in school.

But seriously, who does that?

I'm sure each of you guys has read several different accounts on the Manti Te'o story. I would encourage you to read Clay Travis' account at OutKicktheCoverage.com. He has brilliant insight on the situation and I'm siding with him.

I don't think Te'o got "catfished". I think he made up this whole story for personal gain. I never thought a Mormon going to a Catholic school could do such a thing! In this day and age, anything is possible.

I can't believe I haven't been questioned about being a fake journalist yet.

Many of you guys sent in questions related to the Manti Te'o situation. I was really hoping for this! Let's dive in!

Kyle MacDonald writes:
What do you put WKU's chances at for winning the Sun Belt Tournament?

If I'm putting this on the basic "How Hot is a Girl" scale, I'm giving our chances of winning the Sun Belt a 7 out of 10. Right now this WKU team is a decent looking girl. Tall, slender with pretty face but we are lacking that one quality that takes us from cute to smoking hot.

In the regular season I'm more than happy to date a 7 for a few months. She's attractive enough to take out in public and on certain nights when she's fixed up, she can even look like an 8 or 8.5.

We all know that our buddy has been dating a smoking hot 9 all year long (MTSU). What makes the 9 more appealing than our 7? The 9 brings it every day and every night. It's hard to wake up by a 9 in the morning and be terrified by seeing them without makeup on; they're just way too hot.

You remember that really hot girl you had a crush on in middle school? She was the one that all the guys gawked over and wanted to be seen with at coke break.

What happened to her over time?

She became less attractive and the other girls that had been biding their time took over at the top of the hotness pyramid.

I'm fine with WKU being a 7 right now because I know in March we will be a stone cold 9.

All we need is a little more time for our young guys to mature and our older guys to get healthy. We will be fine come tournament time. I sure wouldn't want to play us.

Sometimes it pays off to date the less attractive girl because eventually she will become pretty smoking hot.

If you're still following, let us move on to the next question.

Nashville Golden Flash asks:
Adam, I will go ahead and be the one to ask the first question. Since football signing day is not too far away and the 2013 football commitment list (see link) is still not showing any quarterbacks, I have the feeling that Topper fans might be curious to know if Petrino will be signing any quarterbacks in his first recruiting class. As you know, most football fans are already familiar with the physical attributes that are required for a Division I quarterback. So my questions have to do with the mental attributes that are analogous to the position of a Division I quarterback. Since the hardest attribute to evaluate is how a quarterback's mind works, explain how college recruiters are able to assess a player's thought process. Because the speed of Division I defenses and the complexity of the quarterback position can be overwhelming, how is a recruiter able to know whether a high school player will be capable of making good, consistent decisions at the next level? Since Division I action is a blur compared to high school football, can combines or camps ever simulate the speed of Division I football and what do you believe is the best way to evaluate a quarterback's decision making skills?

Whoa, what a question.

I am going to do some more research on that and get back to you next week. I'd like to talk to a coach about how they judge a kids mental toughness.

I can tell you that next year's quarterback situation is looking good. We have Mauro and presumably Smith that will be battling for first string.

Smith was a 4-star QB coming out of high school and was being recruited by Louisville once upon a time. All indications are pointing to him being eligible next season.
Mauro will be a good quarterback as well. He came in and had a huge impact for an injured Kawaun Jakes in the Arkansas State game. He has got playing time the last two seasons and I believe he could beat out Smith for the starting job.

We also received a commitment from O'Fallon (IL) quarterback Todd Porter today.

Ty Winchester writes:
Will you go out with me? Is Eddie gonna be back tomorrow? And what about the improvement of Rostov lately. Starting to look more comfortable.

I'm truly flattered by your first question and I will consider it. Hit me up on Twitter! ;)

To answer your second question, Eddie is still day-to-day. I checked back this afternoon and there is no certainty on his return for the UALR game. If I had to guess I would say he may dress but probably will not see any playing time.

We have seen some improvement from Rostov lately. He is starting to look a lot more comfortable on the DI level. His defense in the ULL game was pretty good. He only shot 1-5 from the field but ended up with seven points and five rebounds.

Rostov will definitely help us in the future, it's just a matter of time before he can become truly effective. Hopefully he will find his shot and will be a force both inside and out.

Luke Gilliam would like to know:
On a scale of 1-Terrence Boyd, what are the chances of double A bolting to USF? #HopeNot #GoTops

You guys know I'm a fool for questions that involve me rating a topic on a scale.

I'm assuming like most scales, 1, represents a low chance, unlikliness, or disapproval.
We all remember how crazy Terrence Boyd was. He went from being "the best player the Sun Belt has ever seen" to the craziest person the Sun Belt never saw. He was so weird that
Ken MacDonald cut him during the middle of the summer. Boyd's last WKU related activity, according to Caden Dickerson, was running around outside butt naked in a thunderstorm.

Anyways, the possibility of Antonio Andrews leaving WKU is a big, fat ZERO.
Even if he wanted to leave the Hill, Antonio doesn't have the grades. The only way he could transfer is if he somehow graduated early and went to USF for a degree that Western Kentucky doesn't offer. You will see Antonio Andrews back in a red uniform next season. Fall back, bro.

Tops5 also asked me that question. I hope that helps.

Garret Browning writes:
If you had a fake girlfriend who would it be?

This is a tough question because I don't know if I would rather just make up a lie about an actual person or if I would just completely start from scratch with a fake girl.

If I had to choose, I would choose to make up lies about dating a celebrity. I think that I could somehow make this believable with my new status of Basketball Analyst for Yahoo! Sports' WKU Rivals.

Here is my fake girlfriend depth chart:


Brooklyn Decker- No question about this one. She's not only my top blonde, she's my starting QB. Throw me a lot of touchdowns, Brooklyn.

Alice Eve: I am very strangely attracted to her. It's not even that strange because she's smoking hot. I feel like she is the kind of girl I could actually convince to play along with me. Hell, she might even date me!*

*No she won't.

Jennifer Aniston: MILF alert. We all know about her.

Stacey Keibler: Former WWE diva. She helped me get through puberty. Is there honestly a better way to get through this life struggle? With so many emotional and physical changes going on with a young boy at that point in life, is there a better way to sprout into a young man? You literally have fighting and sex appeal all in one show! America ,the beautiful.

Erin Andrews: I love sports and I love blondes. She completes me.


Megan Fox: As if Transformers wasn't a good enough movie without her. The best of the best in my opinion. She could definitely be my fake girlfriend any day of the week.

Mila Kunis: I've always had a special place in my heart for Mila. She became a little less attractive when she was the voice of Meg from Family Guy but its okay, I can look past her flaws. She is also in one of my all-time favorite movies, Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

Jessica Alba: Also in some of my favorite movies. I can appreciate a girl with a weird penguin obsession. Me and Jessica would fake date so hard.

Clay Travis Come on. Don't act like my obsession with him is weird. Have you looked at my Twitter avatar lately? Clay and I are destined to work together some day…

The Hispanic Chika from Modern Family: Aye, aye, aye. Calinte, calinte! Ahribia! I'm not fluid in Spanish but I think that's the correct spelling.


Betty White: DUH!

Red Heads

Scarlett Johansson: I'm not even sure if Scarlett is an actual red head. She has basically had different colored hair in every movie I've seen her in but that doesn't stop me from wanting to be her fake boyfriend. Love speaks all languages and Johansson's hotness knows all hair colors.
Sorry, she's the only red head. We all know REAL gingers don't have souls. I don't need that fake girlfriend drama in my life.

Luke G. asks:
Oprah, Barbara Walters, your girlfriend..you gotta [phornicate with] one, marry one, kill one....GO!

I'll take death.

Yup, these are my readers.

Adam Haley


Western Kentucky NEWS


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